Thursday, November 20, 2008

You Are "The Answer"

Oh Lord, I am so frightened. My world seems so dark. I know that Your Word is the answer. Take away my fear and replace it with calm assurance. Only You my Lord are able to do this. Yes, my world is dark and You are the Light.

Heavenly Father, give me the words and wisdom to attain the answer. Warm this Doctors heart, that he might listen to me and hear my cries of pain. You are the Great Physician, his boss. I ask Lord, that you guide this man in his instruction. I ask dear Lord, that You will give this man the answers that I so badly need.

I believe that You alone have the answers. I believe that You are the answer. Selah

I have begun to take notice. I have begun to understand that You alone govern all things, even the hearts and minds of man. I know without a single doubt that You have the power over all of this, my life, my pain. I have come to a realization that I have tried to do things on my own. This is a dark and desolate place to be. Light my path sweet Jesus. Take my hand and walk with me please. Hear my cries, my desperation. I can not do this alone. Only You, my Master can help me. I plead with You, I implore with You to listen to my prayers.

My prayers to You Heavenly Father are that I might learn from this and use it to Your glory. I beg for a pardon for the many years, a culmination of sin. My sin, my behavior has caused such great pain in my mind, body and soul. As well, I have harmed many because of my sinful and selfish behaviors. Forgive me Father and allow me to rise above it. Do not let this have hold of me any longer. I beg You my precious Lord. To this day, I pay for the consequences of my actions. I also realize that I will continue to pay but if I have Your forgiveness, I may live. My children pay, their children pay for the sins of both the Father and Mother. Forgive them for what they do not know. Forgive them for the wrong they have done because of what I may have taught them. These sins weigh upon me so heavily. I am drowning. Save me Father. I am Your daughter and I ask for Your help now.

This has been a long journey but I have arrived with the realization that You and You alone are the Answer. Allow me to move forward instead of the digress I suffer from now. Allow me in the Autumn of my life some peace and joy again. This can only happen if I know you have forgiven me. I can not go another minute with this sin upon me. Forgive it and allow me to live again. Why do I struggle so with all of this?

Today is important to me, my Lord. I was crazy sick last time. Let this Doctor not concentrate on that or any other matter but to hear my words. Let nothing else matter but to effectively treat my pain, please? Yes, warm his heart to my situation. Give him the answers as You are my Doctor, You are his Superior, You run that office. Why did I not see the importance of coming to You first and foremost? I see now that I was trying to do it all alone, relying on myself.

It was as if I was blind, driving a car. I wreck and wreck and wreck until there is but a shell. I ask You Sweet Sweet Jesus to drive the car. I lean upon You and I ask for wisdom and guidance. I am so very lost. Please take my hand and guide my way. I do believe that You are this Answer, the only Answer, the ultimate Answer and I must learn to seek You first, in all things.

You know my Lord, I have lived my life and learned all things the hard way. This is why it is such an "Ah Ha" moment for me when I do come to the understanding that if I seek you first and include You in all things, I just might do the right thing. I just might see a positive outcome.

Yes, I seek Your face, I seek Your blessings. I have barely made it through this life. I am scarred and scared but I know that if I seek You first, I seek Your blessings and rely only upon You, all will be well.

My Lord, my Master, King of all Kings, I come before You. I kneel at Your feet. I humbly ask for Your forgiveness and for Your blessings on this very day. I ask for Your intervention on my behalf. Please help me, my Lord. Please drive the car, hold my hand and light my way. I am so weak, my mind is muddled and such a mess. Calm my fears, take away this pain. Be my Answer, yes, You and You alone are the only Answer. I praise Your Holy Name. Amen

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