Dear Heavenly Father,
I ask for your forgiveness before I come in front of you. My head is hung low, I am in turmoil. I must remind myself that all things are for a reason. But I believe in Divine Intervention. I believe that Prayers can and do make a difference. I believe you hear my prayers and you answer many of them. I believe in the power of prayer to make things happen, to change things, to make a difference. If I can not have this faith, what, my Lord is the very point?
My Master, I humbly come before you. Yes, all things are for a reason, every minute of the day, every action, cause and reaction, cause and effect. It's all relevant, it all matters. Every person we meet,every thing we do or don't do, it all matters. Even the birth of a beautiful child plagued with sickness such as my Austen.
I want to run and hide, the pain is too great. Then I get angry and for this I am sorry, please forgive me Father. Did I learn? Yes, I am here asking you for your help. Is it enough? No, I never give to you what I need to give, my faith is never strong enough. But I do strive to be a better person. I do strive to have more faith, faith in practice, as involuntary as my breathing. I stand before you convicted and out loud, cry for your forgiveness. Please Father, weigh my sin, compile it and then wipe it away. I know that these things happen because of the sins of the father...and this mother. Forgive my part. Forgive my children for they were taught these things, forgive them for what they do not know, do not understand. Give me time on this earth to right my wrongs. Give me time to teach by example. I beg you my Lord.
Austen is a product of all this. He suffers for the sins of the father. But as I said, my gracious Lord, you have the power to override all things. You are the Great Physician. It occurs to me that you use Austen to teach his father and mother, to rely on you, to come to you, to not walk around aimlessly within their pain. It occurs to me that you want them as well, to stand in front of you, humbly asking for your forgiveness. Thy Will Be Done. Selah
Knowing all this, I ask for strength, faith and wisdom to endure this time of trial. I fight back the tears as I write this. It is the self-will run riot and it is hard to
Let Go & Let God, when it comes to my children. I did a poor job, the greatest sin and they pay for it. May I know your grace and mercy, your forgiveness abound. Please?
Through all this, I ask that this child, Austen who now has had a seizure on top of MRSA on top of Cystic Fibrosis, not remember the pain, poking, prodding that he must endure. I beg you my Lord. When he goes on Monday for this test for seizures, I ask you to heal him long before he steps into that long corridor within the confines of that hospital. Yes Lord, I am privy to your awesome power and I know if you choose to, that child will not have seizures every again. How much more can his tiny body take? How many more meds need to be compounded upon him? Not one more, my Lord? Please?
I have never met this Grandchild, yet I hear his gentle spirit. His soul soars even amongst his sickness. He smiles and coos, giggles and laughs and I just know, even as sick as he is, his soul is humble. I ask you to be merciful with this child. I ask for your healing arms to wrap around him. Let him not suffer as you deal with his parents and myself. I know there is consequence for every single sinful thing we do. let him not be a consequence. No Lord, please allow him to be a joyful reason to celebrate your love and timely healing. Let us see your work, through this child.
I thank you, in advance for your wonderful healing. I thank you in advance for what I know and believe you can do for Austen Cody Moore and I praise your Holy Name for all things. In Yeshua Ha'Mashiach Name, I ask for Austen to be covered in the Blood of protection. I ask all these things in Your name, my Lord. Amen & Amen